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“I never meant to hurt you.”

Stormy Trees

Stormy Trees. (c) May 2012, Windy Johansen.

“I never meant to hurt you.”

These are funny words. Not funny, “ha-ha”… funny, “oh, rats.”

The good guys say it. The bad ones say it. And if you’re in the wrong place and time, it’s all but impossible to tell who really means you harm.

I probably think about this more, being a victim of abuse in several forms. And yet, it can’t be just me who is horrified about how easy it is for the bad guys to look like the good ones.

I think though, if I listen to the Divine through the stillness, I will begin to perceive the fabric of another’s being. Not everything (that’s not fair!), but the part that’s important to the situation at hand.

If the person is awful they will say, “I never meant to hurt you” and appear to mean every molecule of that shaped breath. And I will see, under the shimmer, a terrifying, blaring something.

The once pretty fabric is aflame. One thread…several threads. I don’t know.

I will realize that this is their real intent. It doesn’t have to be all-encompassing, but it is there. Be it one thread or many, it howls. It flares… hotly, angrily.

No matter the shimmer, I will hear the words of the hot anger.

“I did mean to hurt you. I don’t really care.”

This is a signal flare. A warning. A cold wind fans the flames and makes me icy cold.

If this person is a good person, there may be signs of old anger. Thread sections still smoldering. But this is not the anger of recently fed flames.

Their mouth says, “I never meant to hurt you.”

And the tiny, slowly shrinking flames? “You know, I really didn’t want to do that. I’m sorry. I’m still learning. Forgive me, and I’ll try again. I love you enough to try again.”

And they will mean every molecule of the shaped breath. They will want to tell you what’s woven into the fabric of their being.

“I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry. Can we try again? I wanted to get it right. I want to get it right. I might still mess up, but I want to get it right. For you and for all those that I love.”

“I never meant to hurt you.”

Glowing Tulip (c) Windy Johansen.

Glowing Tulip (c) May 2012, Windy Johansen.

About rootedphoenix

I am the owner and blogger on this site. Hi! :D I like sparkles, sweets, and being nice. But I also laugh at snarky things. So I'm a work in progress.
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